Fingers Crossed for a Boring 2010

Happy New Year! We are pretty glad to say goodbye to 2009. It wasn't all bad, but there was way too much going on. In the 12 months of 2009:

• Zac got laid off and got depressed
• I left one job and started another
• Quinn changed schools twice (one school closed, he "aged out" of the second school by turning three, and he began school district preschool)
• Quinn transitioned from "early intervention" to "status 2" services through the regional center
• In the regional center and school transitions, we had to changes social workers, occupational therapists, speech therapists, and physical therapists
• We bought a house, remodeled it (with two contractors because we had to fire the first one), and moved into it. We lived with the remodeling for some time, including periods of having no kitchen, no furnace, unreliable electricity, and people and noise in our house for months.

Of course this is an incomplete list. We are so grateful to our friends and family for supporting us through all of this. We know we owe you! Adieu, 2009. May 2010 be totally uneventful!

Ch-ch-ch-change

So much has been happening lately, I haven't had any time to blog. Some quick catch up:

- Quinn is three! His birthday was a week ago. It's a little hard to see my baby growing up, but I can't be sentimental for long while being attacked with hugs and smiles. He just glowed at his party as he saw many people he knew come over. It was his first birthday that he really enjoyed. I don't think he had any idea why people were coming over and giving him gifts, but he had a fantastic time. I am so grateful for his adorable, affectionate, joyous presence in our lives, and appreciate all of the things he has taught me. I love being Quinn's mom.
- We all had a sad, sad last day at his early intervention program, and sad, sad goodbyes with his OT, PT, and ST. As you can see in the picture in the previous post, he started at his new school, and the transition is about as expected. Quinn seems apprehensive when we drop him off and gets fussy towards the end of the (longer) school day. But according to his teacher, he is having some fun there with water and play doh and music, so it seems like he is adjusting.
- Based on a recent assessment, Quinn will most likely qualify for "status 2" from the Regional Center. This means we will still get some continuing support from the Regional Center, like respite and case management, which is a relief.
- Our move was stressful (see below), but it's great to be in our new community. I'm enjoying the beautiful September weather (in the Bay Area, September is a warm, low-fog, no-rain month) and exploring our new neighborhood. Quinn is turning into a real beach baby, and I'm delighted because I have many happy seaside memories from childhood (the Jersey shore). Our new street is also much busier than our old street, which may seem like a drawback, but to Quinn it's a benefit. He is spending a lot of time jumping and gawking at buses and trucks.
- We are having major contractor woes. I really hope we have a usable kitchen, a foundation, and a furnace soon. This has put a damper on the elation I might otherwise feel about our exciting new digs to say the least.

In our new house

I'll have to add a picture to this later, but we are officially in our new house! We've been here since Friday afternoon. It was an challenging experience, as most moves are, requiring an army of helpers, including two professional movers, two grandparents, two professional packing assistants, a babysitter, two cleaning people, plus a salvation army pickup for a truckful of no-longer-needed belongings.

But the hardest part is behind us, so now we can enjoy the new home - especially once the kitchen and yard are usable. Right now, it's a bit like camping, and though that was fun over the weekend, I am ready to settle in. Some of that is within our control - like if we can find the box of linens so Quinn, Zac, and I can stop sharing the one towel we could locate...

You don't ask, you don't get

This is one of my father's favorite sayings. (And though my mother doesn't say it, she follows it, too.) I scoff sometimes when he invokes it if what's at stake seems trivial to me (I'm not asking for the $5 anyone owes me if it the time it will take me to get it is worth more to me than the cash.) But last week, what was at stake was significant, and I was glad to have had this mantra drilled into my head throughout my childhood.

As LSFX readers may recall, we had a great IEP in which we were offered everything we wanted: an intensive, specialized half-day preschool program, PT, OT, ST, etc. However, we are moving very soon (the house is almost done - more on that in another post!), and we had this IEP in our current school district, which is in the same SELPA as our new school district, so everything is supposed to transfer pretty smoothly.

However, when I called the new school district a couple of weeks ago to let them know we were on our way and find out about the preschool options, I was told that "all that was available" was a 2.5-hour per day general special education preschool. I was miffed, but wasn't sure what I could do.

I started to investigate our options - private school, inter-district transfer, etc. Then I decided to call the new school district back and politely nudge just a bit more:

I'm a little concerned that the preschool program we discussed last time we spoke would not be appropriate for my son. I'm considering private preschool and some other options. Could we move up our scheduled meeting to discuss the options?

We don't know even know what your son's needs and goals are.

Yes, we do, we have an IEP and a half-day, intensive program is what we signed and agreed to.

Well, actually, we do have a half-day intensive, specialized preschool program. Let's meet a week earlier and you can visit it at that time to see if it would be a good fit.

That would be great, thanks! Quinn's been doing so well in his current intensive half-day early intervention program, I just want to make sure he continues to progress.

!!!!

The first time I spoke with this person, this second option was never brought up. Who knows if Quinn will end up going to this program (though it sounds good), but I am much relieved, and reminded how powerful it can be simply to ask. You don't ask, you don't get.